Why I Won't Be a Good Mom

We'll get to the title later, a ton of things happened in my life today that I must update you on:

1. Sometimes when I am driving to school I like to explore the web on my phone to keep myself entertained and awake. Today, I was reading over comments on my blog, and I discovered that I have a reader I didn't even know about! Her name is Amber and she is a fabulous girl from Phi Lamb at Texas State. You can check out Amber's blog here. P.S. Amber, what happened to you coming to TV night? We really miss you there!

2. David called me today at school and gave me an update of his first week or so on Mission Year. He still isn't living in his house, so be praying that repairs on his team's place will be finished soon.

3. At school, in my Adult Neurological class we have been learning how to treat people who have problems with chewing, swallowing, and eating. One thing you sometimes have to do is puree food, or put corn starch in liquids to thicken them up. Our teacher thought it would be a good idea for us to try some of these things, so we had pureed Salisbury steak and lasagna, and thickened apple juice and water. A few things I learned from this experience:

1. The more time I spend around people, the more I realize that I am an absolute freak. No one else in my class had trouble eating any of the food because its tastes exactly the same. I, however, could not finish it without gagging because the textures of the food bothered me so much. Also, our teacher took a survey and I was the only one in my class who won't eat their food if it touches. What a weirdo.

2. I have a new respect for nurses, speech language pathologists, and occupational therapists that focus on feeding issues. Doing the feeding therapy was difficult on people just pretending to have disabilities, I don't think I could handle the real thing.

4. Today, Brett officially made me Vice President if he ever becomes President of Texas. He even posted my laws with some adjustments. I shall continue to post new laws as I come up with them on here and in the group, just in case you aren't a member. I wouldn't want you to inadvertently break a law.

5. Another problem I have? An obsession with T.V. My roommates and I counted over 20 shows a week that we DVR when all of our shows are in season. Additionally, today on One Tree Hill one of the main characters died and my roommates and I were very upset. Almost like we actually lost a real friend. I get way to emotionally involved in T.V. shows.

6. On a side night, Paris Hilton has a new show on MTV where people compete to be her best friend. It looks promisingly hilarious. There is a gay Asian man who I mistook for a woman until halfway through the preview show. I'm holding out for him to win it all, although I'm still not sure what exactly you win....Kelsey, given your love of the Simple Life, I think you will like this show.

7. Today, I noticed that throughout the day, I come up with tons of blog post topics, but then forget them when its time to write. To solve this problem, I have started writing down my blog post ideas. I think this will take my blogging to a whole new level.

8. And lastly, the point that relates to the title. Today, I went to work at the church daycare and there was a kid named T.J. Today we talked, our conversation went a little something like this:
Me: "Hey little man, want to know my real name so you can stop poking me to get my attention?"
T.J.: "Yes please"
Me: "My name is Jenna."
T.J.: "Cool, My name is T.J. and I am four."
Me: "What does T.J. stand for?"
T.J.: "Timothy James. I go by T.J., but my mom calls me Timothy James when I get in trouble, so you'll probably be calling me that a lot."

Tonight T.J. purposely dumped snacks on the floor and stepped on them just to make a mess. He also called a girl who wouldn't share toys names. He also jumped from furniture so he could play Superman. I didn't discipline him because T.J. is cute and we are friends. I noticed that I didn't discipline my favorite kids at Kactus Kidz either.

So, now I have a fear that I won't be able to discipline my children, because half the time, when kids do bad stuff, its funny, so I laugh instead of discipline. I'm also pretty sure that I'll like my kids a bit more than I like the average child, and I find I have problems disciplining children I like. I really don't want to be that mom that doesn't discipline her kids and raises a big bunch of big brats. Hopefully, my fear of this will change my ways when I have my own kids.

Fearing Motherhood,
Jenna